Jackie: Two weeks done

In my first two weeks, I lost about 15 lbs. Today is the first day of the last two weeks.

I think I lose faster than Dawn does because I'm hyper! I'm sure as hell not doing hard labor, but I am always up and running between grading papers or writing emails.

I cheated a tad this morning...I had about 3/4 of a cup of rice left in the pan, so I just finished it off rather than eating the 1/2 and saving the 1/4. Greedy! I could be put into the torture chamber for that, you know. Don't tell Kim Jung-Il or I'm TOAST.

I shouldn't be glib. But in the real world, that is EXACTLY what would have happened if I were in a N. Korean prison (ie., slow murder farm).

Lentil Salvation

by DMC

Yesterday I cheated -- almost. Let's just say, I was in a foul, stressed mood due to external circumstances, and I wanted copious amounts of alcohol and decadent cheesecake--or at least a glass of wine! On my way home from work, I almost stopped someplace. God knows, I had ample opportunities with all the food joints littering the sides of the freeways.

Instead, Jackie and I went swimming, and then to the co-op and another grocery store. We picked up some lentils and she told me how she had made those fabulous lentils to go with our rice (basically onion, a smidge of vegetarian broth powder, and a bay leaf). Okay, so technically they don't get onions and broth and bay leaves in the camps, but considering last night I was so unhappy that I actually skipped my dinner of rice and beans, the lentils are a necessity! Yesterday I subsisted on a tiny square of polenta. Before going to bed, I ate a small tomato. That's it. Not exactly healthy -- I think yesterday ended up being a total of 100 calories. So this morning, I'm dragging. My brain feels like mud and my limbs like mush. I have the lentils simmering on the stove now. Soon, I'll be able to bring my blood glucose level back up to a somewhat salvageable level... in about 25 minutes or so when, hopefully, the lentils finish cooking.

As for my weight, the scale is down 12.5 lbs since we started 2 weeks ago. The first week I dropped a pound a day, and now the scale tells me half a pound a day.

Jackie: Add your own title

Here's a drawing of an American watching one of those annoying spots about the starving people in Africa from the comfort of his/her own living room.

Same applies if you put a tiny shriveled N. Korean in the box.

Jackie: Suffering

If we weren't suffering, it'd be pointless. Good for you, Dawn, for feeling like crap! Me too! I just want to taste something different. I don't even care if it's a LOT! I don't need to eat a whole cake, just a couple spoonfuls, please!

Maybe we aren't suffering enough. If we were, we'd just be grateful for what we have.

My days are turning out to be this: Wake up, take FOREVER to get ready for work, suddenly get really lively, get to school and teach for 4.5 hours, and struggle to make it home at 1 pm without falling asleep at the wheel. I can do my job, but I run out of energy rather quickly. I do not know what I would be doing if I had to do 12 hours hard labor. I just couldn't do it, that's all. I'd be shot.

Almost two weeks

by DMC

God, I can't wait until this food strike is over. I'm hungry, but at least I'm finding my energy evening out, though I still get bone tired around 9 p.m. The weight loss has slowed, but it's still fairly steady at about half a pound a day. I try to keep active, but I'm not working out. Jackie and I are supposed to be going swimming later today.

I'm not grumpy like Jackie claims to be, but eating nothing but corn, rice, and beans has gotten incredibly boring... and the constant state of hunger is starting to get to me. Today I read an article about the worst fast food bombs... things like the Carl's Jr. Kentucky Bourbon Burger with almost 1,000 calories and a Burger King burger with two pieces of cheese and fried onion strings.

God, that sounds good. The genius that thought to put fried onion strings on a burger deserves a culinary Nobel prize.

Hell, I crave anything other than rice and beans and corn. Even a humble salad sounds like heaven right now! Heck, the strawberries growing in my planter out back keep beckoning me with their ripe, red goodness.

DAMMIT!

It's Day 12, and I just ate my wretched cabbage soup, and I WANT COOKIES! or GRAPENUTS! Holy cow! I'm getting so sick of this stupid food, I can't express it without shrieking! Bleah bleah bleah bleah bleah!

Here is how my daily food ritual takes place.

1 small triangle of polenta in the morning, 75 calories

Tea with MILK! Yes, MILK! I'm Irish, I can't help it! So there are 75 more calories!

For lunch, some sorry cabbage slop, 0 calories, near as I can tell. Not enough to count!

For dinner, 1/2 cup brown rice, 100 calories plus some beans, maybe 1/3 cup, roughly 80 calories.

Total for any given day? 330 calories.

Had to quit quinoa, so I added milk. Quinoa is disgusting unless you add a bunch of stuff to it, such as oil.

I WANT COOKIES!

I'm showing an 8 out of 10 on the bitchometer today, because I want cookies!

LiNK

This is a great website one of our commenters turned me on to:

http://www.linkglobal.org/index.html

Be sure to have a look at it!

How much longer?

by DMC

The night before last, I dreamed of spaghetti and meatballs. Last night it was pumpkin pie, only that one was somewhat of a nightmare. You see, I'm growing pumpkins--yes, in real life. But in my dream, my mother came to visit, picked all my pumpkins and started to bake a pie with them...but a pie that I would be unable to enjoy because I was still committed to this faminesque diet of rice, beans, and cornmeal.

I checked this morning and, thankfully, my pumpkins are still there--bright orange. I only hope they last until August 17th! Perhaps last night's dream was more about my anxiety of having the pumpkins go bad than my hunger for real food.

(And yes, Jackie-the-English-Professor, I made up the word faminesque.)

Jackie: Day 11

Yesterday I thought I was dying. Today I feel like a million bucks. Again, I feel like morale is half the issue. I would have to guess that people in N. Korean prison camps would have horrifyingly low morale. I feel, as a spoiled American, that the hopelessness would be the thing that killed me first. I am staggered by the courage of the people who stay alive in those camps for years and years.

I had to go shopping for new underwear today. Mine is already too big. TMI? Well, I think this is valuable info because, again, of the N. Korean prison camp correlation. People on this diet SHRINK FAST. In 11 days, I'm down 12 lbs.

Here are some interesting articles on very interesting sites.

http://www.northkoreanrefugees.com/2009-07-ling-lee.htm

http://74.125.155.132/search?q=cache:qsZxHJWswt8J:www.bravenewtraveler.com/2009/06/09/the-psychology-behind-north-korean-gulag-camps/+north+korean+prison+camps+water+drinking&cd=10&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&client=safari

Jackie: Dehydration

You know, what's really sickening about this is that N. Korean prisons do NOT allow detainees enough water. If we are feeling this after 10 days, I dread to think what happens after a year. We all know that fluid flushes contaminants out...and those people are not allowed to get rid of any of the poisons that their food brings them.

And check this out for a shocking result of improper diet, noting that North Korea is one of the few places this disease exists: http://current.com/items/77320021_big-bone-disease.htm

Dehydration

by DMC

I've been very thirsty, especially in the evening (after I stop consuming liquids to allow a peaceful night's rest) and in the morning, even though I have a glass of very dilute, unsweetened iced tea practically velcroed to my hand. Jackie spoke to her doctor, and it turns out she's dehydrated, too.

We've figured out the reason we're likely both dehydrated, despite the copious amounts of liquids we seem to be consuming, is because food itself contains water, especially the salads, fruits, and vegetables we consume normally. Though our rice and beans contain some water, it's obvious we're not ingesting nearly as much water from our diet as we normally do. Therefore, we'll have to increase our liquids. About the only way either of us can think to do that is to drink faster!

Interesting article on Ling and Lee

Nicholas Kristoff, a reporter who won the Pulitzer twice, has some actual insight into reporting in N. Korea: "Laura Ling, Euna Lee and North Korea"
http://kristof.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/06/22/laura-ling-euna-lee-and-north-korea/

Jackie: Yes, it's getting harder

I don't know why. You'd think we'd be getting used to it. I think maybe the difficulty is the raging boredom. I wish this diet was making the evil pastries look like the vile poisons that they are rather than salvation-on-a-plate! I have to assume that this problem stems from eating out of boredom. We have to find something else to relieve the tedium rather than munching, such as painting or sewing or writing or exercise. Apart from the fact that boredom eating is really bad for people, it seems that it must be kind of crippling, too, in that we don't do something ELSE that may be creative or productive instead.

But if we were in a North Korean prison camp, there wouldn't be any time for boredom. And we'd be HUNGRY, too hungry to quibble about boring polenta and brown rice...we'd be more worried about dying. I mean, of course I know that if I had to, I could get something better than polenta and brown rice out of my cupboard, so in that way it may be more tormenting for us. But no, that's nowhere as bad as the torment of certain starvation. We've just never really experienced anything worse. This is the hardest thing I ever did, except maybe have a dog put to sleep. I am so much more spoiled than a N. Korean prisoner that there isn't even any comparison.

I know! I need someone to savagely beat me! To apply some psychological torture! to make me sleep in a coffin standing up on end! THEN my food issues won't be so bad!

Gag me with Polenta

by DMC

Yesterday I cooked up a batch of polenta. I've never tried it before. For anyone who doesn't know, it's ground cornmeal. I blended up a tomato and put that in the boiling water and then added the cornmeal. Now, I have a pan in the fridge full of polenta. It's convenient for me to take a small section while the remainder of my corn outside ripens.

But, god... I don't like it. This morning I had to choke it down. Granted, it's not flavored. Hardly any salt. No sugar. No honey. Nothing that might make it good.

Thankfully, I have some of the lentils Jackie cooked. They made for a nice rice-lentil dinner, so at least something tasted good today.

This diet is starting to get hard now. This morning my hunger was quite pronounced, and I find myself running completely out of energy around 8:30 at night, so much so that I can barely lift my legs to climb the stairs to my room. The rest of the day, I'm okay on energy, though this afternoon I was a bit sleepy and took a brief nap.

Jackie and I were out running errands this morning, and we stopped at Starbucks for some iced tea. Let me tell you, Starbuck's pastry case has never looked so good, and it didn't help having to pass about a thousand fast food joints on our drive when all I'd had was a piece of polenta about the size of a credit card (albeit a bit thicker).

Jackie: Morale

I am unbelievably excited about the MP3 recording Dawn just sent me; I wonder if there's a way to put it on this blog...It's a five minute article about our hunger strike, recorded in Korean, and HEARD in Korea! OMG, I can't believe how cool that is...maybe people in Korea will hear that Americans ARE concerned about their welfare, and that we DO know about their shocking living conditions! Oh boy, I am just SO excited! Thank you thank you, Voice of America, for believing in our efforts!

Now I feel like I can keep this up awhile longer!

Negotiations begin for Laura and Euna

by DMC

Well, there's some good news, finally. According to news articles, the U.S. has started sensitive negotiations with North Korea regarding Euna Lee and Laura Ling. According to the article, the next few weeks will prove critical to the negotiations.

Weeks.

They've already been away from their families for months.

I hope they're both released soon, but I also hope, after their release, the world doesn't forget about North Korea and its inhumane prison labor camps.

Tonight Jackie and I ate dinner together--right at the kitchen table. We put our meager helping of rice and lentils in attractive bowls, grabbed our drinks, napkins and spoons, and dug in. As you might imagine, the meal didn't last that long, but the lentils (courtesy of Jackie) were fantastic and a welcome change from the black beans I've been having the past few days.

Jackie: Weight Loss

I am greatly sobered this morning. I lost 9.5 pounds the first 7 days of this protest. I'm not doing any hard labor. It scares me to think how fast the people in Korean prisons would lose weight when most of them had no spare pounds to begin with. I can see how a thin person could die in as little as a month. Being in a North Korean prison is as bad as having a virulent case of cancer.

For some reason, this 9.5 number has really driven it home for me. It's terrifying.

The dr says as long as I keep my activity up, my metabolism won't shut down, so I'm doing my usual running around like a chicken with its head cut off. But let's say I weighed about 100 when I got thrown into prison, and I was facing a 10-year sentence, and then I began the hard labor (mining, fieldwork, cutting trees, etc); I would expect to lose a lot more than 9.5 lbs. a week.

That isn't a prison, it's a murder camp. Therefore, I accuse the North Korean government of mass murder with plenty of malice aforethought.

Jackie: I just cheered up

Am I the only one who thinks it's hilarious that the current negotiations with North Korea are called the Phuket Forum? I'm so immature! But then, it sounds like Phuket was pretty much the response of North Korea, so I guess they aren't a lot more mature than I am. http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090723/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/as_clinton_asia

Coming to the end of the week

by DMC

Well, tomorrow marks the 1 week anniversary of our food strike (today is technically Day 7, as we started Friday). I picked an ear of corn from my garden, but it wasn't quite ripe, which didn't much matter. I ate it, anyway.

I'm been drinking water and dilute, noncaloric iced tea like crazy. I did have a few bursts of energy today, and my headache has subsided for now.

I hope (and suspect) that Euna Lee and Laura Ling are actually eating better than we are right now, considering it wouldn't be good to have North Korea's bargaining chips take seriously ill. Nevertheless, there are thousands if not millions of people whose names and face remain a mystery who aren't so lucky.

Just to give an idea of what it's like in such a labor prison, I leave you with Lee Soon Ok's witness account. She was a former North Korean party official who became a victim of North Korea's criminal system. She endured extensive torture that resulted in, among other permanent injuries, the loss of eight teeth and permanent facial paralysis.

"I testify that most of the 6,000 prisoners who were there when I arrived in 1987 had quietly perished under the harsh prison conditions by the time I was released in 1992." Lee Soon Ok recounted numerous incidents of torture and deaths of individuals in her camp, including the murder of infants and abortions of fetuses of women in the camp upon their arrival.

Jackie: Day 7, and I'm Crabby!

My dang students are now pretty much starting out each class by trying to get a feel for where I am on the bitch-o-meter. Sigh. But they are very tolerant of my...shall we say "directness"?--because they know I'm trying to do something worthwhile.

I have hit a place in which I feel resistant to my assigned foodstuffs. I would rather go hungry! I'd rather starve! (spoiled American!) Ok, that IS what I'm doing, but the point is that sometimes I'd rather just forget the food entirely!

Don't worry, I won't.

Jackie: Why I'm Doing This

I'm doing this for Dawn's reasons below, plus one more. North Korea tries extremely hard to keep all its dirty little secrets within its borders. I fear that somewhere down the line, we are going to hear again a familiar American line that was often repeated regarding Nazi Germany and its own concentration camps: "But we didn't know what was going on in there." The fact is, this time many of us do, and so can anybody who does a simple google search of North Korean prisons. And those who find out need to spread the word to anybody who will or will not listen. It's a moral imperative; when millions of people are suffering, you do NOT turn the other cheek. You INTERFERE. I am interfering with North Korea's code of silence: North Korea is starving and torturing millions of people.

Why are we doing this?

by DMC

I can't speak wholly for Jackie, but I decided to embark on this food protest simply to raise awareness about conditions inside North Korean Labor Prisons, where infants are routinely murdered, prisoners are starved, and most people are in there, not because they committed a crime, but because they were under suspicion of being critical of Kim Jong Il or have the misfortune of being related, within three generations, of someone who allegedly committed some offense.

Of course, if you happen to be related to the wrong person, it doesn't matter how much you toe the party line. You get your butt arrested and thrown into a prison camp where you subsist on a handful of cornmeal and cabbage soup a day, along with any bugs and reptiles you can catch.

And, heaven forbid, you're a baby fresh from your mother's womb. You are likely to find yourself killed and tossed away into a garbage bin. Heck, that's a step above abortion, but it's ultimately cheaper than doing an abortion procedure, I suppose.

I'm doing this for one very simple reason -- if you're reading this, you're getting a bit of information that maybe you didn't have before, and maybe this information makes an impression on you. If it doesn't, well, why are you still reading?

And, as an added bonus, if it generates one more news story that mentions two American journalists are being held by North Korea as a bargaining chip, depriving a four-year old child of her mother, then hey...it's done something.

Yesterday was hard

by DMC

I was really hungry all day. Now that I've switched to a tea cup worth of rice and beans instead of the quinoa, I estimate my daily caloric intake to be about 250 per day. I like the rice much better than the quinoa, but it's a pretty bland diet either way. Yesterday in the early evening I went to the food co-op with Jackie to buy some Polenta and a smidge of ultra low calorie chicken broth and some different beans. I plan to put about a teaspoon of chicken broth in the next batch of rice I cook, just to give it a tad more flavor. Yes, I know the prisoners of North Korea don't get chicken broth (in fact, they generally don't get the rice and beans), but in a few more days, I'm going to truly despise rice and beans! So, trying for a tiny bit of variety can't hurt to help me get through the next 25 days or so!

I'm concerned that there hasn't been any news about Laura Ling and Euna Lee, and I hope our nation isn't on the verge of forgetting them. However, I hope while we remember that these two women are still captive in North Korea, thousands of other people are being starved and tortured in North Korean labor camps. I urge anyone who is curious enough to read this blog to do a web search for "North Korea labor prison" and spend a few minutes reading.

Jackie: Day 5 is nearly over

It was easier teaching today than yesterday; also, my gut had resolved itself by this morning with yesterday's antispasmodics and pain pills and a long sleep. I feel like I have plenty of energy, and I didn't even need a nap this afternoon, which I have been needing for the last 3 days. In fact, Dawn and I went to the Co-op and bought a few supplies (I was just about out of brown rice and cabbage! Oh no!); then we went out and sat in Bella Bru with luxurious (!) glasses of iced tea and chatted in a cool and peaceful atmosphere.

We had an interesting telephone chat with a Sacramento Bee reporter. With any luck, we might get a little publicity for the effort! That would be wonderful, if people would actually notice that someone cared about Ling and Lee and the N. Korean prisoners. If it appears, I will post the link.

UPDATE: Story in the Bee.
Thanks, Gina Kim, for helping us on our mission.

Cold Rice and Beans

by DMC

Well, I feel good today, but more hungry than I thought, apparently. I ate my rice and beans this morning, a little earlier than I had planned as I like to save them for lunch or a late brunch. I chopped up my tomato and mixed up the small portion, and then ate it ravenously. I got about 3/4 of the way through before I realized I never heated it up. It was still cold from the refrigerator.

And, you know what? It tasted just fine. I guess hunger does that to the brain--makes things taste sooo much better. I know it would've tasted even better hot (or at least warm!) but...oh well. There goes my main meal for the day.

Yesterday was okay, though my limbs were a bit achy. I got through work just fine, though I did encounter one difficulty. Some co-workers asked me to lunch since we haven't gone out in a while, and I had to decline. All I said was, "Thank you, but I can't. I'm on a very strict diet."

Jackie: Monday night

My thoughts are turning really dark...

My chronic gut issues were bugging me today. I knew that was coming; whenever my descending colon gets empty, it cramps up bigtime. I had to take a valium twice, which resulted in some slightly monotone lectures and a really long nap afterwards. I snapped at one student, and then I sort of heard myself and asked, am I being bitchier than usual? One woman said NO, you're being perfect! So I guess maybe the guy was being a pain in the butt and deserved it. But I will have to watch it because being really hungry does result in a short temper, at least partially because one isn't being sedated by sugar, I bet...

I feel really skinny. I know that's ridiculous after 4 days, but boy, my stomach is emptying and shrinking nicely. Now, if I were in a prison camp, eating three hundred calories a day and working twelve long hours, IMAGINE how much I would be shrinking. Imagine the fear of knowing that I was already a skinny citizen of a starving country, and then imagine the fear of knowing that I would be losing weight fast. Imagine knowing that nobody could do a thing for me, that my family couldn't help because they were all locked up with me, starving beside me as a result of something I said that made the dictator doubt my patriotism. Imagine being that one woman who started out 5'2” and after a couple years was only 4'6”. Who knew you could lose stature as well as belly fat?

I too have lost about four or five pounds in four days, and I'm sure as heck not doing hard labor, and I'm getting high-quality skimpy food, not trash skimpy food, and I'm getting plenty of clean water so my kidneys don't hurt and my other organs don't grind away at themselves without adequate lubrication.

You know, it makes more sense to me (in a horrible and terrifying way) that a country would starve and torture foreigners than that a country would starve and torture its own. That is just unthinkable. It's like the biggest insecurity ever, if even your own country hates you and wants you dead. I can't even imagine how lost and invisible those inmates must be in that despicable man's system. What kind of a monster must he be, with what kind of black soul?

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's off to work I go

by DMC

Well, it's Monday, and this will be my first day in the office since I started the food strike. The headache still lingers, but it's manageable for now. I'm hungry, though. I have not eaten anything for breakfast, but I packed my lunch -- a meager 2/3 cup of the rice and beans mixture.

As a bonus, the scale is down about 4.5 lbs.

Jackie: Monday morning, day 4

I have a chronic pain thing in my left abdomen just below the lowest ribs. There is something in there, a pinched nerve or a spot of crohn's, they aren't really sure. But it's part of the reason I overeat: for some reason, if it hurts and I pig out, the pain stops. I believe that eating unkinks a certain spot that tends to spasm. Well, with my stomach seriously empty, that spot HURTS. I'm going to have to get back on valium to relax it. Hope it doesn't relax my resolve as well. We all know the body tries to trick us into eating ("If you don't feed me right now, I'm going to make you faint!"), but that's not it. I've had this most of my life. But it might be aggravated by the empty gut. OW. Feels like a constant foot cramp in my side.

I haven't heard a word about Ling and Lee in days...seems really odd. Maybe N. Korea is too focused on its dying leader to worry about them.

Sunday thoughts

by DMC

Today I feel much better. I crashed early last night, and the rest did me well. The prisoners in North Korea's labor camps, however, do not get adequate rest. Their days are filled with long hours of hard labor, too little sleep, and too little food.

I cooked up 3 days worth of rice and beans today, and in the process realized I'd been making an error. I was using a 1/2 cup measuring spoon (writing had worn partially off) instead of the 1/3. Well, I found the newer 1/3 cup in my drawer and realized my mistake.

Although that's not a large difference in food volume, it sure felt like it when I finished my meal today.

Jackie: Math Isn't My Strong Suit, but....

Even eating organic foods, I'm spending about five bucks a week to stay alive. No wonder that asshole feeds his prisoners so little...he doesn't want to spend the money. It might take away from all the finery at court.

Forgive me if I sound bitter. I always get cranky when I'm hungry.

Jackie: Yardsale Day

There doesn't seem to be any news about Lee and Ling today. I hope that means they are in quiet negotiations...

It was 100 degrees today here in Sacramento, so I guess it could have been worse, but not by much. In some ways it was a pleasant day. The heat was only miserable for the last couple hours; before that the yard was comparatively cool and it was fun talking amongst the five of us trying to sell stuff. As usual the customers only wanted the crap instead of the good stuff; people will buy ANYthing at a yard sale, any garbage at all, provided that it costs less than a dollar. It doesn't matter how good the good things are; if they cost ten bucks, they aren't a good deal!

Oh well. At least in part I suspect that my annoyance was due to the fact that I wasn't full. It's true that I ate something without even noticing it. Bizarre. Tony, who is diabetic and shouldn't have been eating the damn things at all, was passing out Chips Ahoy, which I hate! My hand went out and took two. In the middle of the second one I realized that I was eating! I threw out that second half and spent an hour beating myself up. Very strange, that eating without noticing. I am going to pay particular attention to my creepy relationship with food over the next 28 days.

I am glad I read several journals of people going on long-term water fasts before this started. I am seeing myself doing and feeling what all the others felt. Body feels achy more than hungry, as if it's trying to trick me into eating. Three days of that will be followed with a couple days of halitosis (poor students!) and tiredness, and after that I expect to feel the beginnings of mental acuity and general physical energy. My awareness will gradually become heightened as I experience being me without the automatic responses to food. This isn't just about food; it's about automatic responses to many aspects of everyday life without actually deliberately making choices.

I have only been hungry for periods of about five minutes, maybe three times so far in 48 hours. I pour tea or water in and my stomach shuts up. I read a long time ago that we often eat when in fact we are thirsty. Funny that we respond to stimuli without stopping to wonder what particular stimuli we are reacting TO.

Oh this is all pretty intellectual. So many people on this earth eat this way on a regular basis, and they aren't a bit interested in their habitual responses to things like Chips Ahoy or actual good food. They are just trying to survive, not enjoy. I would like to be in their heads for one minute though and experience their reaction to people like me and our odd relationships with things we think we need.

Like air conditioning!!!

Day two comes to a close

by DMC

Today I'm not feeling too well. I woke up a bit hypoglycemic, I think, because I felt a little tired and shaky. The fact that it was barely after 5 a.m. likely didn't help. I had agreed to be at Jackie's place this morning by 6 a.m. to help load some boxes for her garage sale. Making my breakfast (another small batch of Quinoa and beans) proved difficult in the hub bub of trying to get ready, pack the car, and get out of here on time.

I took about half the batch with me for breakfast, and the other half I ate for dinner. Dinner also included another cob of corn. Remarkably, I didn't finish the Quinoa and beans. I downed most of the terribly bland concoction, but I quickly lost my apetite and gave the tiny remaining amount to the dogs.

I think maybe I have a bit of heat stroke. Though we sat in the shade most of the day, I have a headache and my cheeks look a bit shiny, as if they got a bit too much sun. Also, I was pretty exhausted most of today, having not slept very well last night and then running on little food. I'm about to turn in for the night, though it's not even dark outside yet.

Jackie had a brief and unintentional lapse today, but I won't rat her out completely! I'll leave that to her, should she choose to confess.

Jackie: the end of my first day

I'm not actually all that hungry. I wonder why I eat all the time?

I had my piece of polenta this morning; this evening I had 3/4 cup of brown rice with 1/2 cup of garbanzo beans. (Note to self: garbanzo beans are only 60 cals. per half cup!) I'm eating my rice and beans cold because it's 103 outside, and it tastes GOOD!

Dawn found the following article on line....

http://www.pacificcitizen.org/

The women just might get out! Woohoo!!!! But their release won't get me off the hook unless Kim Jung-Il suddenly decides to let everybody else out as well.

My first day

by DMC

I started my morning off with a cob of corn picked from my garden. Now, at about 4:00 p.m., I finished my last bit of food for today--a mixture of 1/3 cup Quinoa, 1/3 cup kidney beans, and one small tomato. I wasn't nearly as clever as Jackie; I didn't cook enough to last me several days. I'm not even sure how to cook Quinoa, so I considered this a trial run. I think I need to rinse the Quinoa more in the future and cook the kidney beans a little less (I nuked the beans, and a few exploded). Tomorrow I'll cook a larger batch and divide it up for easy meal planning.

Today was pretty easy. I'm surprised. Yeah, I've been hungry ever since waking up, but it's been manageable. The corn did almost nothing for my hunger except ignite it with the promise of food and then barely deliver, but it tasted great having been freshly picked. My hunger rumbled low all through the noon hour and stayed pretty steady, but I drank plenty of water.

Now, after finishing my small bowl of dinner, I'm still hungry, but not terribly so. Tomorrow I have to help Jackie with a garage sale, so that should be an interesting day. We'll see how much energy I maintain throughout the day tomorrow.

UPDATE, 8:20 p.m.: Okay, now I'm hungry. Really, really hungry. My sister's visiting, and she's having a deli sandwich for dinner. She had the decency to go outside to the patio table to eat, but I can still see her, and the idea of a sandwich is soooo nice right now. I think I'll head to bed early so I don't have to think about it much longer.

Jackie: My first day

I started out MY day by cooking some polenta and some brown rice. I cooked a cup of each and it looks like enough food for a week. One cup of dry polenta has 650 or so calories; it made like six cups of food, which I turned into a pan to cool and cut into 9 squares, about 75 calories apiece. I ate one of them at lunch today. It's fine. Plain but clean and organic! I seriously doubt the Korean prisoners are getting anything better than floor sweepings and rat turds. I froze 5 pieces, because otherwise it will be rotten by the time I get to the fourth day.

The brown rice is 3 cups, so about 4 servings, at 150 calories each.

One piece of polenta is 75 calories; 3/4 cup of rice is 150 calories; cabbage is pretty much zero; 1/2 cup of beans is 80 calories. Roughly 300 calories per day. I also had a diet coke today...not on the North Korean Food Plan, but no calories either...

I gave all my refridgerated food away today. It will be pretty nasty in 30 days!

I will post later about how I'm feeling after one whole day.

It's HERE!

by DMC

Today marks the start of our 30-day food strike in protest of North Korea's inhumane labor camps and imprisonment of Euna Lee and Laura Ling. I began my morning by picking one small cob of corn from my garden, boiling it, and eating it for breakfast. I hope to keep busy today to keep my mind off food. (Jackie, how are you doing this morning?)

Last day of food freedom winds to an end

by DMC

Well, it's 9:00, and I'll be heading to bed soon. When I wake tomorrow, I'll be committed to the new regime -- limiting myself to approximately 350 calories a day.

My food intake will be as follows:

Corn (on or off the cob): 80 calories

Brown Rice (1/3 cup): 70 calories

Beans (1/3 cup): 75 calories

1 Tomato (in place of cabbage): 33

Total Calories: approximately 258 per day

I've decided to substitute tomatoes for cabbage because, well...to be frank...I'm growing tomatoes (I have tomato plants galore!) and it just seems a shame to let them go to waste (I can give some away, and I will, but it'd be nice to get the benefit of them myself). Since cabbage and tomatoes aren't terribly far apart nutritionally (both are good sources of vitamin C), this substitution makes sense.

In addition, on some days, I may substitute Quinoa for brown rice. Quinoa is much higher in calorie than brown rice, so 1/3 of a cup would be about 229 calories (according to the back of my package). So on days I eat Quinoa, my caloric intake will be about 417.

Hence, for the next month, I'll be living on approximately 250-415 calories per day, plus any non-caloric liquids. (Remember, prisoners of North Korea don't get Quinoa; most live off about a cup of cornmeal and cabbage soup a day).

As it so happens, my sister is coming into town tomorrow, and as part of our ritual whenever we pay each other a visit, we go out to eat at Mimi's and order the citrus salmon then hit up the Big Spoon yogurt. I've told her we can still do that, but I won't be eating. I'll sip my iced tea, sans sugar, and she can order the usual. I hope I don't get too many strange looks. She told me -- no worries. It'll just be like when she does Ramadan and can't eat until after sunset. She's often decided to go out to lunch with me and my mother (when we're visiting) and just enjoy the conversation.

So for now, goodnight, and I'll leave you with this youtube video Jackie sent me about Kim Jong-il, it's a little dark humor to end the night.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHkWv1vHtHk

The Day Approaches

Jackie

The Kaiser nutritionist called me today to tell me her opinion on this drastic calorie reduction diet. After I described our project to her, she had three pieces of advice: 1) to keep up on my liquid intake (which will be no problem; I will be drinking water to make myself feel full!); 2) to take an ordinary multi-vitamin; and 3) to enjoy the experience. That is really what she said! OK, well, if she's not going to try to talk me out of it, it is doable. No more stressing about health issues.

I have been going thru my fridge and trying to eat up the perishables. There's still a lot more, and it's leaving the house on Friday. Last night Dawn and I ate at Fresh Choice, saying goodbye to all the lovely cool crisp greens that we won't be seeing for awhile, and today I ate just slightly lightly. Tomorrow I will be focusing on fruit juices and teas. Then Friday is the big day.

********

I hope things change for North Korea once Kim Jong-il steps down. But I'm not very confident about it. I think his son has been primed to act the same way, or even worse. He did some time in a Western school under an alias, with American students; maybe this will help him to understand Western culture, or maybe it will make him despise us even more. I can only hope that he has a more intuitive relationship with the rest of the world than his father has.

NEWSFLASH

Kim Jong Il close to death--see http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,532441,00.html

Jackie: Insanity

I had a note from my doctor today giving me a Kaiser phone number I can call for nutritional advice. OK, I am thinking that they will just tell me not to do this, or that they will assume I'm a nut. Can't wait to try to explain this whole deal to some anonymous clinicians at a call center!

Truth be known, I'm feeling nuttier. Everything I read about North Korea, and there's TONS of it out there, terrifies me. It is no better than Nazi Germany, not one bit, and the idea that people this horrifying exist on the planet is not exactly a fun one. The citizens nearly all believe in Kim Jong-il from the bottom of their hearts, believe that their government is wonderful and has their best interests at heart. They are so innocent. All those years of terrorism and brainwashing...it makes me wonder how much brainwashing I myself have been subject to. After all, I believe most of the stuff I read about North Korea, and what do I base it on? A bunch of internet reports. I bet that is what some North Korean citizens base their patriotism on. I can only imagine how they would feel if they ever knew the truth about their own lives.

I sure hope Laura Ling and Euna Lee eventually get to talk about it all, report on the story they went there to investigate. We need to know more first hand information about the insanity.

Preparing for the " kyo-hwa-so " fast

by DMC

Kyo-hwa-so are North Korean "re-education" camps where prisoners supposedly undergo "reform through labor." David Hawk, author of the 2004 study "The Hidden Gulag: Exposing North Korea's Prison Camps, describes conditions in these camps.

"It's extremely hard labor under extremely brutal conditions," said Hawk. "These places have very high rates of deaths in detention. The casualties from forced labor and inadequate food supplies are very high."

In order to prepare for my "Kyo-hwa-so" food strike, I'm going to avoid splurging on a big meal the day before. Instead, I'll plan to eat light, easily-digested meals on Wednesday and Thursday, the days before I embark on my 30-day endeavor. Since today is Monday, that leaves me with only tomorrow to eat normally (though I today I did splurge on a donut someone brought to work since I'll be deprived of anything even remotely resembling refined sugar for the next month).

I hope to get to the grocery store this afternoon to buy some brown rice. Other than that, I'm working my way through the perishables in my refrigerator and cupboard so I don't waste anymore food than necessary. I am not sure what is going to happen with the pumpkins I'm growing. Hopefully, I can keep them going for another 30 days, but I doubt it. Perhaps I'll take up canning.

Jackie: vitamins

I have lately been reading the journals of people fasting on only water. They go totally hungry for up to 40 days, ingesting only water. Very interesting stuff, the phases they go thru in the process, each eventually discovering that they mainly seek food for emotional purposes, largely meaning social connections. Just about every culture eats as part of celebrations. Who has the 4th of July without food? Who has Chinese New Year without food? Nah, we gotta pig out at these things, and social events feel weird without food. Food seems to make us relax. Anyway, I digress. None of the journals I read involved any great discomfort UNTIL the fasters neglected to drink adequate water, and then all hell would break loose. That is very important to remember.

Scurvy. Well, there's this bit of info:

Does cooking destroy vitamin C?

Vitamin C is the most easily destroyed vitamin there is. It is destroyed by oxygen, heat (above 70 degrees) and it leaks out into the cooking water because it is a water soluble vitamin.

To preserve vitamin C in food, store citrus fruits, tomatoes, juices, broccoli, green peppers, cantaloupe and strawberries in the refrigerator uncut until you need them. Prepare dishes with these foods right before serving. Also, cut these foods in larger pieces to prevent the air from destroying vitamin C. Cook these foods in as little water and as short a time as possible. Steaming and stir-frying are two methods that help conserve vitamin C content.

As long as the skin is uncut, the vitamin C is protected from air. If you store a cut fruit or vegetable or an open pitcher of juice, cover it tightly with plastic and put it in the refrigerator.

Vitamin C dissolves in cooking water so serve the food with the cooking water if possible.

This would seem to indicate that unless we barely, barely soak the cabbage in water, we won't be getting much Vitamin C from cabbage. I think I will just try putting a little lemon juice in my drinking water instead. Not enough Vitamin C to fight oxydation, so I guess I'll get wrinkly at an accelerated rate this month. On the other hand, another very important thing is in cabbage...potassium. Now that is incentive to eat cabbage "soup" (read: smelly limp green stuff in hot water).

I am not going to worry too too much about vitamins until Dr. Chan writes me and tells me otherwise. I had my bloodwork done today and I emailed her to tell her about this project. I think I may wish to continue taking my usual Vitamin D, though. And my three prescriptions. They don't have much nutritional value anyhow.

Dangers of food strike

by DMC

I've been asked whether I'm encouraging others to join in this hunger strike. Let me be clear--I'm neither encouraging nor discouraging anyone from joining in the near-fast, but should you consider it, I will strongly encourage you to speak with a physician first.

One of my concerns with this 30 day food strike (i.e., limiting myself to about 350 calories a day--which is about what the North Korean prisoners receive) is malnutrition. Scurvy was one ailment I thought about, so after doing some research, I discovered that cabbage is a decent source of Vitamin C. I suppose that explains the cabbage soup given to the prisoners. Though cabbage wards off scurvy, 350 calories a day on a diet of cornmeal and cabbage soup isn't enough to sustain life for any significant period of time. Fortunately, we're only doing this strike for 30 days, and of course, unlike the prisoners in North Korea, we always have the option of stopping our food strike should we suffer serious health consequences.

Unfortunately, I despise cabbage, so I had planned to skip the cabbage soup. It looks like I'll have to incorporate it into my meager diet over the next 30 days, after all. I suppose by the end of the first week, I'll be happy to ingest whatever I can...even cabbage. I only hope that this endeavor makes a few people think about what life must be like for prisoners in North Korea's labor camps (many of whom committed no crime except, perhaps, failing to worship Kim Jong-il or being related, within three generations, to someone considered a dissident).

Jackie: Damn fridge is full of food

My two favorite comestibles on earth, in recent weeks, have been Grape Nuts and champagne. OK, cheap (relatively) California pseudo-champagne, but still. Wait, that sounds like I dump champagne on my Grape Nuts instead of milk, which is not what I meant at all...I was actually referring to entirely separate meals.

And why, one might ask, am I running off at the mouth about Grape Nuts and fake champagne? Well...I am about a week away from thinking I'm HUNGRY, and it's starting to scare me.

Hang on, I need a glass of champagne.

OK that's better.

I feel like I need to say something rather important: I haven't had the nerve to tell my really close friends or my family (some of whom are Chinese) that I'm about to embark upon a hunger strike on behalf of people I have never heard of before, meaning all the behind-the-scenes captives of North Korea. People I'm close to will say I'm being overly dramatic, I'm fairly sure. That's what people tell those who are earnestly INTO some kind of a cause. That they are overdoing it. I just haven't wanted to hear the scolding, or to have to defend myself. I mean, this month of under-eating is going to be obnoxious; I don't need to hear a bunch of people who NEVER go off the deep end for their causes scolding me and making me lose my resolve. Hey, whatever happened to the '70s, when we were totally ok with getting arrested for our causes? And now it's all, Ooooh Jackie, that's just CRAZY, you mean to NOT EAT VERY MUCH for 30 days? Yeah, that sounds pretty scary and intense, all right. Man, I hate the part where I have to say to my mom, "Oh, sorry, can't meet you for lunch, gotta starve...." EEEEEK!

And one other thing. I think we have been over estimating our food count. 1/4 cup of dry quinoa is 175 calories, which I think will be about 3/4 of a cup cooked. Then, 1/2 cup of beans is about 80 calories, for a running total of 255 calories and 1.25 cups of food. Then we get some corn and maybe some boiled cabbage. Oh dear. I think we will actually be getting about 350 calories a day if we mean to approximate the well-fed N. Korean inmates' food intake. Ack! Scurvy, here I come! I think I may add lemon juice to my water so I don't bleed from the gums, for Pete's sake. That is NOT a very authentic experience, but then, my goal is to suffer for thirty days, not forever. I don't want to get any permanent damage, like all those Korean people are getting.

I am going for a routine blood panel tomorrow morning. I have already emailed Dr. Ruby Chan (thank the goddess my doctor is Asian and MIGHT understand why I'm doing this) to let her know of my intentions regarding this whole hunger strike. I guess if my test results indicate that I should NOT be doing this, she'll tell me. But I can't imagine that anyone will tell me that, assuming I stick to my prescriptions and a few ordinary vitamins. Hey, I'm doing this to suffer temporarily, not permanently. Right, Dr. Chan?

Ah well, we Irish are famous for hunger strikes, right? Anybody remember Bernadette Devlin?

Man, I have SO much food to eat this week before the "fast" begins....

Capitol Vigil held for Euna and Laura

Jackie and I trekked over to the State Capitol yesterday evening for the vigil held to support the release of Euna Lee and Laura Ling. It was warm as I stood on the steps of the capitol, holding a sign and listening to the various speakers--including Laura's sister Lisa Ling (photo below) who spoke about the phone call she received. During that call, Laura told Lisa that the only hope of their return was if the U.S. government asked for amnesty. Laura also admitted to breaking North Korea law.

I don't know whether Lee and Ling actually broke North Korea law. After all, forced confessions with the promise of release are nothing new to political prisoners, as was demonstrated by Roxana Saberi, who spent four months in an Iranian prison and at one point issued a false confession upon a promise of release. So, while I doubt the authenticity of Ling's confession, I don't think it really matters whether Ling and Lee actually broke the law. North Korea's labor prisons represent a horrific violation of basic human rights, and there is no place for government-sponsored murder, torture, and infanticide in today's society.

I'm hopeful that Euna and Laura will be released, especially considering their sentence to a labor camp has not yet been implemented (as far as anyone knows) and the fact that Lisa was allowed to call home to request amnesty. For now, I leave you with these photos of the protest and a request that you take a moment to google "North Korea Labor Prison" if you have any doubts about whether we should be taking such a stand against North Korea.

Jackie: I Can't Stop Now

I am pondering what to do if Lee and Ling get out (which I sure wouldn't count on, even if Ling DID read to her sister from a script supplied by Pyongyang officials). I think, oh yay, I don't have to eat gruel, yay yay! And then all that cheering resounds emptily in my head because ok, two American prisoners hypothetically get out of hell, but what about the thousands upon thousands of inmates remaining and starving in the prisons? Heck, what about the millions and millions of ordinary, non “criminal” citizens of North Korea who are starving while the leaders get whatever they want? Don't we still have a lot to protest, even if the US gets its two citizens back?

What would Lee and Ling say? They would say, you stopped because WE are free? What about all the people remaining in that hellhole?

And then I wonder, what would all those other people feel like? They'd know in their guts that they just don't matter as much as two American women. That Americans view them as disposable, just as their own leadership does.

Well. I can't see any way around it. Amnesty or no amnesty, I will have to go hungry for a month.

See http://www.lauraandeuna.com/ or http://www.kcra.com/news/19993756/detail.html for updates on the journalists.

Preparing for July 17th with a glimmer of hope

by DMC

We're still prepping to begin our sympathy hunger strike to mimic condition in the North Korean labor prisons. Unfortunately, the news about Laura Ling and Euna Lee has been scarce. Ling grew up in Carmichael, so Sacramento-area news organizations seem to have greater interest in her fate than the national organizations. Today, for example, News 10 reported that Laura Ling and Euna Lee asked for amnesty and that Laura was able to call her sister Lisa. A vigil at the State Capitol will be held Thursday for the two imprisoned women.

The information about the phone call and the request for amnesty gives me a glimmer of hope that maybe--just maybe--these two women will be released in the near future. However, if North Korea really is holding them as bargaining chips, it is likely to want something in return. The silence on this issue from the media and the U.S. government, however, is troublesome. The phrase, "Out of sight, out of mind" strikes a chord with me, and I can't help but think about what Euna and Laura are experiencing right now. I know they're likely being held in somewhat better accommodations than many others who are sent to labor camps. That's a small comfort, but I'm still troubled by knowing that thousands of human beings are suffering virtually unendurable abuse at the hands of North Korean officials.

I ponder whether these two women might even be released prior to July 17th. While I think that unlikely, the mention of a request for amnesty gives me hope. What then, do I do, if they are released prior to July 17th? Do I continue with my planned sympathy food strike, or do I rejoice and continue life as usual.

I'm not sure. While I know I'll rejoice, another part of me will still be thinking about the men and women whose faces and names I don't know who are being starved and tortured in one of North Korea's labor camps. I think about the newborn babies who are killed in front of their mothers, their bodies tossed away like garbage. I think about this as I sit here, on my couch, typing on my wireless keyboard, while my dogs snooze blissfully a few feet away. Here, I have comfort, central heating and air, a well-stocked kitchen, and a cozy bed I cuddle into at night. I get vacation days and sick leave away from work, where my "hard labor" is done behind a desk, most days, in an ergonomic chair.

I don't feel guilty for my modern conveniences and freedoms. I do, however, hope not to forget about the suffering others, far away, are enduring, though I can only educate myself by reading witness accounts and cannot possibly truly understand what living years on end in a horrific North Korean labor camp is really like.

So, will I continue with my "one bowl" sympathy strike come July 17th even if Laura and Euna are released before then? I don't know. What I do know is that I don't want people to forget about the torture and murders in North Korea if, by some wonderful miracle, Lee and Ling are released from prison and allowed to return home.

No matter what happens to Laura Ling and Euna Lee, there are still thousands of people suffering in these labor camps--starving and abused. Newborn babies are still being killed in front of their mothers. Every day, these crimes against humanity happen, and every day that they continue to happen is one day too many.

Click for info on the Capitol rally

Jackie: Jitters

I'm worried about a few things, but my concerns must be nothing in comparison to what Lee and Ling were feeling the day of their sentencing. For example, should I have a major last pigout for a day or two before the 17th, or should I be getting myself used to small portions? I'm inclined to do a juice fast for at least two days before the hunger strike begins. Seems like it would be too much of a shock to go from overeating to undereating divided only by one night of nervous poor sleeping. Of course, Lee and Ling didn't get the luxury of deciding how they would prepare to starve.

As coincidence would have it, I have to go in for a routine bunch of blood tests that my doctor ordered for my annual physical. It would be interesting to get her to order the same panel thirty days later.

As this thing unfolds, I will be recording my weight to see how much I lose. I'm guessing that my metabolism will drop from the limited caloric intake and that I won't lose as much as Lee and Ling will, whose systems will be pumping from all the hard physical labor. I'll be whining about feeling weak and dizzy, but I'll try to remember that I don't have it half bad.

Funny how I'm stressing about having to live for a few weeks on a diet equivalent to what people all over the world face every day of their lives. I'm acting like it's deprivation. My stomach hurts already just thinking about it.

Maybe this was a dumb idea! Will my getting a stomach ache and a messed-up metabolism help Lee and Ling? Probably not...but at least I will learn a few things about the real world, meaning the world beyond American excesses. I know that even some Americans eat the way Lee and Ling do, but I live in a ghetto and my neighbors all seemed to find a few bucks for fireworks last week. I don't think many of them subsist on a small bowl of food a day. They eat Burger King.