Jackie: Yes, it's getting harder

I don't know why. You'd think we'd be getting used to it. I think maybe the difficulty is the raging boredom. I wish this diet was making the evil pastries look like the vile poisons that they are rather than salvation-on-a-plate! I have to assume that this problem stems from eating out of boredom. We have to find something else to relieve the tedium rather than munching, such as painting or sewing or writing or exercise. Apart from the fact that boredom eating is really bad for people, it seems that it must be kind of crippling, too, in that we don't do something ELSE that may be creative or productive instead.

But if we were in a North Korean prison camp, there wouldn't be any time for boredom. And we'd be HUNGRY, too hungry to quibble about boring polenta and brown rice...we'd be more worried about dying. I mean, of course I know that if I had to, I could get something better than polenta and brown rice out of my cupboard, so in that way it may be more tormenting for us. But no, that's nowhere as bad as the torment of certain starvation. We've just never really experienced anything worse. This is the hardest thing I ever did, except maybe have a dog put to sleep. I am so much more spoiled than a N. Korean prisoner that there isn't even any comparison.

I know! I need someone to savagely beat me! To apply some psychological torture! to make me sleep in a coffin standing up on end! THEN my food issues won't be so bad!